Zillionaire Warrior Goddess
Melissa McCarthy…I LOVE YOU!
I have totes been on the yo-yo track when it comes to my body weight.
My land of comfort is the energy realms, the ones we can’t see.
I couldn’t make any real money until I resolved this though.
I needed to learn how to master the concrete, physical realm,
so it could complement the non-physical realms I adored,
and felt most comfortable in.
You know, the realms where imagination thrives, bliss reigns,
and there are no humans to complicate things? 😉
Money is of the physical realm. Mastering it means anchoring,
in the here and now, on the physical earth. And staying there.
This doesn’t mean we can’t use our energy mastery skills though!
So what’s this got to do with Body Weight?
Money, like our body, requires us to fully inhabit the physical realm.
If you’re anything like me, Lovie, your idea of fun is,
and most likely always has been,
playing in imagination realm.
Creating our own books, works of art, video series – you name it.
If it’s on the ether plane, it’s ours!
Our alien tentacles come out, and we can relax.
(that was a joke…..or is it?)
But can we relax on the physical plane?
That’s up to you to answer.
For a long time, I couldn’t – especially when things felt out of control,
like when I was compelled to take synthetic chemicals for my body.
The Earth-Air Separation Factor
In psychology, we call it dissociation.
For fun here, I’ll call it Earth-Air separation:
when we don’t like earth, we focus on flying in the air.
Either way, we aren’t grounded, fully present, in the here-now.
We don’t do this because we want to.
Most highly sensitive women would be delighted,
it would be a dream come true to many, in fact,
to have been born without the consistent struggle,
of always feeling the need to protect themselves,
in an oft overwhelming world.
Gaining weight is exactly an attempt to do this.
For me, I subconsciously built a protection around me,
a thick wall of flesh, to guard me from the world.
As if to say, “yeah – okay. I’ll stay here, but it’s not easy.”
I needed help – especially before I was aware of my intuitive power –
spending so much time in the imaginary realms,
and the world of our intellect,
does have us reach a certain level of mastery, after all.
Many times, food grounded me, kept me in my body.
Always, medication was involved, during my bouts of weight gain.
My Weight Gain Sequence
(Possibly yours, too!)
It went like this, before I learned to appreciate + protect my gifts:
- I felt uncomfortable, vulnerable, and unsettled in the world to begin with. Like since I was a little girl. Super sensitive! To everything.
- Whenever “real life trauma” happened – those life events that typical people consider a big deal – like a death in the family, or working on Canada’s second largest murder case – my already delicate nervous system got overloaded, to the point I was so overwhelmed, I couldn’t function enough to carry on with daily life (not as typical people saw it, anyway).
- Before I knew about alternative solutions, I would go to a medical doctor, who would diagnose me with either a physical (anxiety disorder, nervous system dysfunction) or psychological condition (PTSD). They’d give me medication, which distressed my system further, especially if there was more than one – which happened, because: side effects! They then give you more drugs to deal with those…even though I’m a girl who grew up so chemical-free I barely even took aspirin. I still don’t.
- Weight gain happened fast. I’d get embarrassed, feel ashamed, so stayed home more, “waiting for this to pass.” I’d sleep so much, from the impact of a sudden dose of chemicals, I didn’t know what hit me. My physical movement significantly declines.
- Then I’d feel more depressed, eat junk food to feel better, and with barely any physical movement, gain even more weight.
The funny part is, I didn’t struggle with weight at all, until a dose of career stress hit me so hard at age 30.
After a lifetime of being slim and athletic, BAM! My pants got too tight.
True to my intense style, I didn’t just gain a few pounds, either.
I put on 150 pounds.
Yes, you read that right.
A whole person’s worth of extra weight.
Plus-Size Fashion Evolution: Thank Goodness
Beauties, where would we be without the plus-size movement?
I can only imagine feeling degraded was imminent,
back in the day when, if you were larger than a size 10,
you got a man-shaped sweatshirt with a basket of flowers on it.
One or two colours max, to choose from.
Maybe a cat in the basket, if you’re “lucky.”
I gained a lot (pardon the pun) from my experience,
living as a 300 pound woman.
Vanity, which I didn’t even know I had,
was lifted. My compassion for larger women expanded,
as I was yelled at through car windows, as I walked down the street.
Teenagers saying, “hey Fattie! Nobody will ever love you”
or women in grocery line-ups,
asking how many months pregnant I was.
All of this, at the dawn of stylish plus-size boutiques.
There are gazillions of fun, stylish,
And now that I’ve made enough money (they aren’t cheap!),
I can wear them. Not stress about giving away clothes that don’t fit.
Love myself, express my glorious spirit, celebrate me as I am right now,
just as the designers intended.
Melissa McCarthy’s Seven
In 2015, a comedic actress who always made me laugh,
who also happened to be plus-size,
fulfilled her life-long dream of becoming a fashion designer!
Melissa McCarthy launched her clothing line Seven,
and the love she poured into designing them,
making them reasonably accessible,
and her intention to allow women of all sizes to feel fiercely fabulous,
poured into my being.
Wearing these clothes makes me feel like a Goddess,
worthy of artwork. She inspires me on all levels.
As a business woman, a creator, a Zillionnaire Warrior Goddess.
If she did it, we can too.
P.S. As we climb up to meet Melissa in the Zillionnaire Zone, the $10k Zone comes first….here is my gift to you: